Ashton's Rules of Attraction

Ashton Kutcher, in all his fine-fashion-sense, restaurant-owning, kaballah-worshipping, cougar-loving, dude-where's-my-car and punk'd glory, is a total babe.

(Any man comfortable enough with their masculinity to wear a scarf is a babe, yes even old Italian men)

Here, he goes all Betty Friedan on us in Harper's Bazaar and discusses why he loves the ladies.

The Rules of Attraction

The list of things that make a woman desirable is endless. The trick is knowing the things that do not.

By Ashton Kutcher

"I love women. I like the way they think, the way they care. I like the way they flirt by flipping their hair. I am enchanted by their precision and persistence. The ability they have to maneuver through life reminds me of a cat on a mantelpiece navigating around trinkets, photo frames, and flowers. I'm astounded by the feminine pain threshold (I've witnessed childbirth), fragility (PMS is a bitch), and strength (my sister used to beat me up). In fact, the only way I can really share what makes a woman attractive is to describe the few things that don't.

COMMON SCENTS

If I can smell your perfume and we're not making out, you're wearing too much. More of a lot of things in life is better. Perfume does not apply. Have you ever stood in an elevator waiting for the doors to open so that a fragrant person will get off and you can breathe again? Don't be that woman.

TRASH TALKING

People who speak negatively about others attract the same in kind, and I don't want to be near it. Nothing is sexier than a woman who is confident enough to compliment others (and nothing is more gratifying to another woman than to be the recipient of such a compliment — especially about her shoes).

TRUTH IN ADVERTISING

Dress how you want to be treated. If you show respect for yourself, you will be respected. I like seeing a female body as much as the next guy, but a midriff on display does not do it for me. By the same token, sexlessness is just that. I call it the Hillary Clinton look. She would be so much more appealing if she just took off the pantsuit, took a lesson from Jackie Kennedy, and found her own Oleg Cassini.

JEWELRY JUNKIES

Women who wear big blingin' stones don't look like they have a lot of money; they look like they have a lot of someone else's money. I don't want my woman looking like she got bedazzled. On the other hand, it's really hot when you're dressed up but wearing a cheap little bracelet. It shows you don't take yourself too seriously.

LIKE ATTRACTS LIKE

The most unattractive thing in the world is selfishness. Don't worry about what you are getting; worry about what you're giving. Always show appreciation. Women who focus on what they don't have are unattractive and attract unattractive people.

BRAND DROPPING

Have you ever heard someone say, "Do you like my new Prada sweater?" Broadcasting labels to make people appreciate your style is not becoming. The truth is that most guys don't know what a Birkin bag looks like, and they couldn't pick a pair of Christian Louboutins out of a lineup. All that matters is how something looks on you — and if a guy can identify the brand, you've found your fashion soul mate. And, yes, I do like your sweater. Who made it? You can tell me now.

The key to letting everyone else see just how irresistible you are is knowing it yourself. Go outside your comfort zone. If you're comfortable showing the whole package, show a little less. If you're not, show a little more. If talking around big groups is tough, put yourself out there. If it's easy, hold back. It works both ways.

After that, it's all about having a little restraint. Some would call it mystery. That's attractive."

(copyright Hearst Publications, 2008)

Pondering Picasso in Barcelona

Last week I was able to frequent Barcelona for my second time, and I grew to love it even more: the rambunctious Rambla (a linguistic coincidence?), the eternally-under-construction Sagrada Familia (by this point, it must be deliberate!), the fresh fruit in La Boqueria, the helado, the port harbor and beaches, and the overall modern art deco feel.

I really love Picasso, probably because his talent is so evident in the variety of his work! Sure, he's known for his abstract (and Cubism, and printmaking...), but his earliest works done in childhood and adolescent years are stunning portrait and Impressionistic pieces. It's like he learned all the rules of conventional art very early in life, so he could "break" them and create his own new methods.

A whole section of the museum is dedicated to Picasso's abstract work based on Las Meninas by Velazquez. I had just studied and written about the Velazquez original, so it was enthralling for me to see Picasso's interpretations.

Here is the Velazquez original:

And here are some of Picasso's interpretations:

My favorite:

I just imagined Picasso frequenting the Prado for weeks and months on end, just to stare at Velazquez's masterpiece, scheming on how he would create an original of his own. It's been fun to be in all these places where great artists and inventors once trod...and are still...

Let them wear heels!

I was inspired by the blog of my fabulous childhood friend Al... a little background: we became fast friends in kindergarten as the tallest girls with the same name. Fifteen-something years later, we are both pursuing degrees of or related to writing, and wearing our heels.

The road hasn't been smooth as a tall girl. Standing at 5-feet-11 and 3/4-inches, the larger than life feeling is not just a cliche, but more often than not, a stark reality, realized in every next head-to-toe stare. The irony is that I am the runt of my family (my youngest sister just passed me)! Really, I can't win, even at family reunions (except when measured against the in-laws). But as one who has pretty much come into my own, I appreciate these pieces:

This 6' 4" strawberry blonde is not shy when it comes to heels. Reminds me of my own 6' 3" strawberry blonde sister.

Manolo Blahnik, the shoe designer made famous by Carrie Bradshaw, blogs on tall girls...and the case of Carla Bruni Sarkozy.