Celibacy: so hot right now

Any practicing Mormon doesn't have pre-marital (or extra-marital) sex.

And as more than 95 percent of BYU's student body is Mormon, it makes for a peculiar scene out of the most sensually tense PG-rated movie you've ever seen.

Example: whereas drunken sex is a hallmark of collegiate life elsewhere, the wildest BYU coeds get is a NCMO here and there, and "edgy" parties are ones with caffeinated beverages.

Seriously.

Allow me to translate Provo's sensual lingo:

"Spooning" aka laying horizontally with someone is as scandalous as going to second base with someone elsewhere.

"Hooking up" with someone means you made out with them. And most likely kept your clothes on. For real.

"NCMO" (aka Non-Commital Make Out) is the Provo equivalent of a one-night stand. It's more often than not a thing you want to forget, but once in a while I've seen it lead to a healthy relationship and/or marriage.


Friends at other colleges or even my married friends may say I'm missing out, but I like to think of my celibate life as likened to my pre-tampon years: it's nice to know I can worry about other things than if I forgot to take the Pill this morning....never mind the rumored mood swings and pound gain-age.

But as one who more than once shed prepubescent tears over the prospect of growing up (I did receive The Talk at age 8), I can honestly say I love my life now infinitely more than I loved my younger one.

So viva celibacy!

For now.